Whenever I think of toilet training videos, and I seldom ever do, I think of the awkward parenting that must have given rise to the market, and I think of Full House and clowns coming in to the bathroom to help children learn.  It’s an entirely strange market, with an entirely awkward niche. One that I think as a cameraman, I’ll just decline on fulfilling. Although, it could be neat to make one for cats or something. Imagining myself snickering and laughing to myself at how much cheese the video is as I make my millions from sales.

Come to think of it, I did recently come across a DVD on Litter Training your Cat. And I thought it could be a fun, funny watch and I bought it. And still have yet to watch it. It’s just now occuring to me, why the hell would you need to “train” your cat to use the litter box? Every cat I’ve ever had it was just a matter of bringing it (the cat) in to the house, drop it in the litter box right away, and presto he knows where to shit and piss. Man. It’s just a good thing that DVD was only $1 and I bought it for laughs, not learnings.

With that said, I came across this Japanese toilet training animation clip; it was a “related clip” to this video I was watching about computerized toilets in Japan. It seems that Japanese children have no problem identifying their “poop as being cute.” Yes. The turds in the video were dawned with the classic anime kawaiiness. It’s ridiculous, right down to the victory dancing and the dad wiping his kid’s ass, and the kid waving good-bye to his turd – actually, it’s all a bit reminescent of Mr. Hankey on South Park. Atleast, it’s seemingly in better taste than those damn Charmin bears. I can’t stand those ads, with those damn bears and their…galavanting.

Here, i’ll just post the link already, and you’ll see. Just tell if this Japanese family of animated tigers isn’t loads better than those darn Charmin bears!

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1547408/japanese_toilet_training/

You’ve probably already seen the ads by now, if not…this site is great. GetYourBasketballOn.com, the home of Leroy Smith, the man that motivated Michael Jordan in to becoming the greatest basketball player.

Leroy Smith is played by Charlie Murphy. He’s a motivational speaker that’s been petitioning his way in to the basketbal hall of fame. He works alongside his partner Manny Mayiek, that produces and edits Leroy’s stuff. The videos on here are pretty funny. The DVD previews are alright, and the Interview videos are the best. I’d try to explain my favorite parts, but you really have to see it for yourself. Oh and try your hand at the video game on the site – it starts out easy, but gets pretty hard quick (CHEATERS!)

I really wish this site was for an upcoming movie or something. Unfortunately, after some research, I managed to find out that the site is registered by Nike. Nike best be getting in to the movie industry, because I only wear Chuck Taylors – the original basketbal shoe. Suckers. Wasting your money entertaining me. Good flash basketball game though (although, it still doesn’t beat NBA Jam.)

Yesterday I came across a very useful website, ColorSchemeDesigner.com . It creates color schemes for you, based on what color you choose, and whether you desire tertiary, complementary,etc. Even allows for setting color schemas based on color blindness. And when finished, you can export and download it as a color swatch pallette for either Photoshop or The Gimp. Totally cool stuff.

Was watching screw attacks’ report on Majesco’s response ot PETA’s COOKING MAMA – MAMA KILLS.  Majesco responded by pointing out the numerous vegetarian dishes in their games.

The Peta MAMA KILLS site features a cooking mama game in which you kill and prepare a turkey. You earn bonuses such as wall paper and videos of turkeys being tortured in turkey farms. It gets quite graphic, the game does, as the hatred for meat just oozes off of it…right down to eggs dripping blood when you crack them!

In 2004, I was a younger man, and I put all my faith in Kerry. I felt so strongly that things mattered then, that the world was teetering on that last little hinge. That the sky was going to fall, that the world was going to end. Only, the world didn’t end, but things did go quite sour. Life absorbed me. The working class world, the bum, the beat, and eventually the cynic. It was like being told that Santa Claus wasn’t real.

And here, bam, Obama won. I can’t help but feel like this has made up for ‘04. In retrospect, ‘04 was necessary. Was not for that loss, those 4 more years of war, oil, and spiraling economics would not have came to be heightened, driving people back in to taking an interest in the system.

Man. I just can’t help but feel like it would have been entirely appropiate to play the credits to Star Wars right there after Obama’s acceptance speech.

Out in California some guy tried to rob some farmworkers. He awoke them by rubbing one of them down with spices, and smacking the other with an 8 inch sausage. He was arrested after authorities discovered his wallet still at the scene of the crime.

Aside from the possibility of drugs or mental illness, or even fetishism, I wonder what exactly he was trying to accomplish with the rubbing down of the spices.

http://m.cnn.com/cnn/ne/us/detail/164983

I’ve started on an line of toys that should be out in coming months, just little statues. They will be revealed much in due time.

As of right now, to earn some cash, I’m launching some original art work auctions. First up is a statue I made of a generic RPG style BLOB! It’s cute. I put blood sweat and tears in to it, and it’s reasonably priced. You want it? BUY IT! BID YOUR HEARTS OUT PEOPLE!

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300250428036

Next Up, is not really an original peice of art, as much as it is…my copy of Professor Layton for sale on the Ebay. Bidding Starts at .99cents…Ridiculous.

Professor Layton and the Curious Village Auction

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESELX:IT&item=300249865916

A New Zealand judge took a young girl in to state custody so that her name may be changed. Previously she was so embarassed by her name that she kept it secret, revealing herself only to her friends as “K.” Talula Does the Hula’s new name hasn’t been revealed for the sake of protecting her identity. LAME!

In addition to the name change, the judge has banned people from naming their kids odd names. The Zappa family should have been interviewed and asked stance on the whole situation.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080724/ap_on_re_au_an/new_zealand_bizarre_names

Last month was a bit rough, but I made it through with $6 left in my checking account…or so I thought!

June 30th: POS    CC W/D TRIPLE Adva 877  $14.95

Followed by…    OVERDRAFT FEE $30

And I thought…Who’s Adva 877?  I search high and low…turned out…lo and behold, FREECREDITREPORT.COM was rather known for signing it’s users up against their will for their subscription service. Oh man. I’m gonna tear their ass up.

Anyhoo, just giving the heads up for those of you out there that are thinking of giving them a try.

First, before I forget, work has officially begun on the New Rat Show – guaranteed to be bigger, better, and more badass. I’ll post test shots as they arrive. If anyone would like to compose a theme song and shoot it my way, that’d be cool…

And so I was looking at Smart Pens on Froogle, came across a book by the founder of Lycos, and checked out Lycos in utter amazement that Lycos is still around. I remember when Lycos was a big shot – right on my new out of the Box Windows machine loaded with NETSCAPE came a big blaring icon to click for Lycos. On television, Lycos Lycos Lycos. Then again this is the internet, and all good things become found and then settle. Sort of like Circus Peanuts or Clark Bars. When have you ever seen a commercial for Circus Peanuts? Yet, they have their fan base out there – they really do.

So Lycos displays the weather for your area right on the front page and, I found this to be really neat, gives you suggestions on what to do for the day. And it suggested “start a lemon ade stand.” So being the morbidly over curious individual that I am, I clicked. I clicked and it gave Lycos search results. Of course. It’s a search engine. Google has it’s logo doubling as “learn what today’s all about” and Lycos has “learn what today’s weather is good for.” Neat stuff. Yahoo is incredibly lame. I haven’t been to yahoo in years…except really to occasionally play Yahoo pool.

Moving on (and this is probably my longest post yet?) the first hit was a charity site ran by sunkist. Yes, if you are a kid between the ages of 7 to 12 willing to raise money for charity, Sunkist will GIVE you a FREE lemonade stand. That’s badass. I never ran a lemonade stand as a kid. As a  kid I always assumed it was like “these things happen.” Never played baseball, or ran a stand, or anything, because I thought it was something that happened to you, didn’t realize you just had to ask your parents. It wasn’t like in the movies or video games where a magical fairy or Angel or weird Old Wise Man comes outta the trees and says, “YOU’VE BEEN CHOSEN TO RUN A LEMONADE STAND!” However, that was my view on the world as kid, until I got much older and realized my parents were not the mystical all knowing beings I thought they were. Grrr…if only I was 12 again…or they upped the age to 25, or I knew for sure I could get away with applying for a stand…then I’d totally run one this Summer.

Take A Stand: http://www.sunkist.com/takeastand/